Rolex Kentucky 2010 | Purple Yin

I write this while I watch the ending of Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon. Life and death, skill vs. experience, love vs. time. It's sad and inspiring. "Because of your love I will never be a lonely spirit." Can we say hopeless romantic with emphasis on the hopeless part?

Ok in general, I would say I'm a cheesy, inspired dork who can go from feeling extremely happy to extremely sad in one sitting. I am sometimes pushed to take risks (or what some would consider a risk) out of sheer stupid silly emotion. This has been advantageous at times and embarrassing/painful at others. 

Most of the time I just feel ridiculous and somehow get over it. Constantly. 
As of late I have been removed from my comfort zone on a whole bunch of levels. (I'm now watching Alice in Wonderland. "Oh Dinah, it's just a silly rabbit with a waistcoat...and a watch!") I live in a new place. I'm hanging out with new people. I have new clients and co-workers. I stay cleaner than my horse. Hm, definitely new developments...


This past weekend I attended the Rolex Kentucky Three-Day Event in Lexington. Rachel was kind enough to drive and let me share her hotel room. It was horse overload but I enjoyed every minute. I'm amazed that human beings and horses have the courage, stamina and desire to conquer such feats. Together. (My fat cat snores contently next to me.)


What did I learn?
For one, I'm thankful to be alive. (And that I'm not a walrus.) Oliver Townend's injury had a big effect on me, and the spills others took put things in perspective. If I develop an effective and strong seat I can survive a lot but not everything. Stayed focused and think 3-5 steps ahead at all times. Not that you shouldn't focus on the present, but the present should be in the past in your mind and you should be plotting the next thing.


I need to work harder.
At riding, that is. Winter was a non-productive time for riding, so we're stepping it up now that it's spring and my trainer is back from Florida. Today I applied these mental elements and images to work:


-solid, straight upper spine/back
-shoulders not overly back and not too rigid
-flexible yet strong jelly circulating in my hip angle and lower back
-back inner calf on, contact with knees off 
-light ball weights in my elbows
-finally sorting out my own interpretation of "float and push" (as Erin says)
-OUTSIDE LEG. OUTSIDE SHOULDER
-forward first. forward first.

Alfred likes the new bridle I bought us, so he is happy. The SmartPak event bridles are nice quality for the price range ($120). It was nice to visit their booth to see and feel these bridles in person since they are an online-only shop. The design and leather quality is great, and the company is responsive to customer feedback. I bought a full size for my 16.2h Thoroughbred gelding and it's a bit large, but with everything on the smallest hole it fits great. If you have a more typey TB with a smaller head I would suggest a cob size. I had to punch 3 more holes in the flash. 


VTO Saddlery also had a great selection of products at good prices. Being in the indoor tradeshow they had quite the setup. I got 2 pairs of breeches for $40. Insane. For non-horsey people, usually 1 pair of medium-high quality breeches costs $100-$150USD. 

Over and out for now. Tomorrow is another day.

: : Design Inspiration : : 4/21/10AM

Waking up with coffee and the Cold Mountain soundtrack. *yawn* *stretch*

"Get up girls, don't be bitter. Mess with me I'll pull the trigger," says Jack White. 

I'm actually feeling productive despite getting less than 4 hours of sleep. One thought tearing me out of bed was wondering where my digital camera was, and the second was the burnt rust-colored speckles in my slightly ugly marble counter tops. I couldn't remember what they looked like. I try to memorize their placement to no avail when I brush my teeth (since I have nothing better to do, obviously) and I was thinking about: getting up>teeth brushing>rusty speckles. 

Today I'm embracing my immediate surroundings for design inspiration. I won't be scouring blogs or looking at other designers' work. I've been trying to come up with a stellar design for a friend's vintage clothing store and haven't been too successful. She probably thinks I am taking too long, but I have the freedom to make something different and my own. The next portfolio piece I put on my website is going to be cool, whenever I think of it...

Design ideas in my immediate environment:

Ugly Holiday Inn style marble that has nice individual speckles

The old embroidery framing of a bird in my kitchen

Unintentional brushed stainless steel in the bathtub

Paper pulp

Top layer of dirt in my dying succulent plant

The stain on my wooden salad tongs

  

There is no design without discipline. There is no discipline without intelligence.

— Massimo Vignelli

Not so specifically. Emotionally, rather.

"Bringing" and "carrying" are very different concepts. In French there are different verbs that all technically mean "to carry and/or bring" but they have different contextual and grammatical uses. "To wonder" in French (se demander) translates to "ask oneself." I like this.

For the past few months I have been pulling apart my whole world and rearranging the pieces as best I can. Self-inflicted cleaning of the soul will eventually leave a big empty space somewhere. Just when I think I've arrived at a beautiful new place I look around and am confused again. It's hard to get it all right.

I am tired of tearing things apart and holding stuff back. It just breaks me to no end.


We devote so much time to learning new things, but I am trying to unlearn thought patterns I've acquired over the past 6 years so that I can look at my life with fresh binoculars and microscopes. More powerful lenses, macro and micro. 

Kicking/Kicked Off

Say the word "kick." What does it mean to you? Does it sound weird to say? There is something about self-awareness that comes alive in the weeee hours of...well 10:46? Ok not that late.


the power of choice
Wow that is bigger. But I like it. And no, I'm not going to go off on some pro-choice rant. (And yes, I know beginning a sentence with a conjunction is improper grammar. I'm a copy editor, so I'm allowed to make glaring grammatical incongruities because that is how language(s) evolved and it is more fun to be naughty sometimes.) We all have choices. I chose to eat crap for dinner and now I'm feeling sort of sick. I chose to wipe off my monitor with my finger and now there is a smudge on my screen. Damn. Choices and consequences big and small. This is both awe inspiring and fear invoking.


There are many, many choices we make every day, but one thing those choices all have in common is that we make them. Stick to your guns and the universe will provide (or perhaps The Dude will depending on your frame of reference). Also, make sure you have guns. Then stick to them. You don't necessarily need multiple guns, but perhaps this is a moot point.  

This blog is dedicated to choices, realizations, emotions and most of all experiences. 
We are all made up of relatively the same kinds of atoms (correct me if I'm wrong) but who we are is shaped by the experiences we choose to have. Call me cheesy. Go on. Do it. 

okay, I'll be more specific 
This does not look as cool as "the power of choice" being bigger and bold, but I am going to stick to my guns and keep it formatted as is and own the lowercase-ness (something I hate in typography; however, it's my way of being sarcastic only toward myself). 


I had a choice to make today: should I try to stay on my freaking-out horse or should I just hit the ground and start over? I chose to hit the ground with half of my face/head, shoulder and knee. I've been thinking tonight not only about falling off but getting back on and starting over. It's nice to avoid disaster but also feels great to get shit out of the way and start over. One benefit to eating dirt is that you feel more accomplished when you eventually do get back up. This applies to other areas and disciplines of life too. Obviously.